My name is Blondina, and I am a model, welcome to the first instalment of my blog! The first thing you need to know about me is that I am a huge Vivienne Westwood fan. I have been a follower of 'The Dame' since I first made the pilgrimage to ‘World's End’, way back in the day when that was the only shop she had!

Oh yes I remember ‘punk rock’, the Pirate Collection, Rocking Horse shoes ,Harlequin and Columbine, Buffalo Girls, Sarah Stockbridge (my favourite model ever), The mini-crini, “Don’t you ever kiss me once kiss me twice”, Harris tweed, the man who forgot his trousers, and even the dame who forgot her pants at the palace!

Now I know I don’t look old enough to go that far back, let’s just say that good genes run in my family, and any way what’s lacking in nature can always be made up for with a good plastic surgeon! So age aside here I am, at the peak of my career now working as the Platinum Blonde showroom dummy; and I have to tell you it’s a job I love, for I am in Vivienne Westwood heaven! I spend all day surrounded by gorgeous Vivienne Westwood accessories, handbags with specially picked matching purses. The costume jewellery is to die for and there are delicious scarves made of silks, wool and fine linens, to wraparound my delicate neck; and now we have added Vivienne Westwood ‘Melissa’ shoes to our collection, What girl could ask for anything more?

There is a lot more to being a showroom dummy than one might think; apart from the usual requirements, flawless milky skin, exquisite cheek bones, and thighs to stop a truck, one must also have the ability to sit still for hours on end, gazing out at the high street, looking fabulous and giving the people of Coleshill something to aspire too!

I suppose you could say that I am a bit of a mentor, so I am going to make it my task to guide all you Vivienne Westwood fans towards, what’s in and what’s out?, what’s hot and what’s not?!!!

Lots of Love Blondina x

Thursday, 30 August 2012

Don't you ever Kiss me once!


S/S 2012 Vivienne Westwood Jewellery look book 

"Don't you ever Kiss me once Kiss me twice, Treat Me Nice" this is a line from an Elvis Presley song - and the reason it featured so heavily in this summer's Vivienne Westwood jewellery collection is because it's twenty years since Vivienne spoke the words in her acceptance speech, when she won the 'Designer of the Year Award' for the second year running.

I was there and I have the original t-shirt to prove it!

Vivienne Westwood Designer of the Year '91 & '92 

So why after twenty years at the top was our gloriously eccentric fashion designer only briefly mentioned in the closing ceremony of the London 2012 Olympics?  How can a British, world wide event celebrating our greatest fashion achievements not have focused more closely on Vivienne Westwood????

I admit we were treated to Lily Donaldson wearing a gold Vivienne ball gown but I was expecting a fashion ensemble of young and old, Punks and Pirates, Harlets and Harlequins, a wonderful carnival, expressing trend, style and altar ego through the language of clothes!

Instead we had Victoria Beckham hailed as a fine example of a Brittish fashion designer! Now this is the kind of talk that makes my 'cameo' skin turn red!  For this is quite a slap in the face to our many brilliant designers who cut their teeth on the edge of a pattern cutting table! I wouldn't mind betting that 'Posh Spice' wouldn't know what to do with a pair of fabric scissors; if they were diamond encrusted and presented to her in a velvet box!  Putting your very famous name to a fashion line does not a designer make!

Our Queen of Punk (well Dame technically), is a woman who has given us more thant just quirky clothes - she inspires us to follow fashion as individuals; to use her creativity as a back drop for our own.......she makes us think about what we are? who we are? and what we wear? And to be honest I don't think she was treated very nicely and it was a bit of a kick in the teeth.

Twenty years on since there age of acceptance; Vivienne is still saying " Dont you ever Kiss me once, Kiss me twice, Treat me Nice!"

Me wearing the original t-shirt on a beach in a top secret location.  

Ciao Bella Sorellas;  will speak soon from my 'Holiday Hideaway'!

Blondina x


Wednesday, 15 August 2012



Me in my platinum blonde window cheering on team GB 
What an amazing 17 days we have had! The London 2012 Olympics has delivered far beyond all expectations! For one tiny moment the whole country has put aside the doldrums of the recession and pulled together to celebrate everything that is fabulous about being British! What a wonderfully, multi-cultural, rainbow coloured society we have become! Did you know that just being born British means you have won the lottery of life!


Union Jack man bag and scarf by Vivienne Westwood
The only Olympic live event I got to see was the women's football at the Richoh Arena. I was so excited about my V.I.P tickets to watch our gals in the semi final, I glammed up and hot footed over to the 30,000 seater stadium. Nothing, but nothing could have prepared me to be the only gorgeous blonde amongst 29,000 lesbians! Now let's be honest, nobody minds the odd "Lipstick Lesbian" (in fact it quite takes me back to my college days!) But these were far more of the" Birkenstock" variety - call me old fashioned but I always like a Bush to be well trimmed!   


Me hiding from the amorous attentions of" Hairy Helga the Horrible" 
On the upside, for me the highlight of the games has to be the four man rowing team who in a momentous race took the gold! Unfortunately at the medal ceremony the entire event was upstaged by Henrik Rummel with his "Podium Package!" What can one say? I just thought he was keeping a can of pledge in his pants in case he needed to Polish his medal! 


Henrik Rummel in all his glory! 


 However the 
excitement of the London 2012 Olympics has spread to much further regions than Rummel's rowing shorts. I found a lovely tree in my village, the family who owns it have placed a trinket on their tree for every medal team GB have won! What a beautiful way to celebrate!


The Tree of Hope and Glory. Nether Whitacre near Coleshill.


Let's hope that this British pride continues long after the torch has been extinguished.


Ciao Bella Sorella's
x x





Wednesday, 8 August 2012

Hi all,

I have decided to try internet dating! I know what you're thinking.....why does a gorgeous bombshell like me need to resort to trawling the web fishing for men?! Well, I suffer from the age old problem of being an Alpha-Female and all these men who look longingly at me are just not man enough to sweep me off my feet. 

So I thought i'd have a look online.  It's a bit like internet shopping. Just type in what you're looking for and see what pops up! 

A very charming country gent's profile caught my attention and after I contacted him, he began to woo me.  He seemed suave, slightly eccentric and debonair. A man who could match up to my high standards. So, we arrange to meet at his mansion. 

I dressed in my best Vivienne Westwood dress and my exquisite Agent Provocateur stockings and set off.

But imagine my horror when I arrived at this grotty house and this is who was waiting for me.......



Talk about presumptuous, he was completely naked apart from that ridiculous hat! 

Be careful out there sisters!!

Ciao xx


Wednesday, 1 August 2012


The hottest thing this summer has certainly not been the sun!   No no, in fact I think this seasons ‘what’s hot and what’s not’ award goes to “Fifty Shades of Grey” – the latest girlie “mommy porn” novel to hit the nation. The fastest selling paper back, since Harry Potter, has obviously delved deep into a woman’s psyche and awoken teenage curiosity in us all.





Christian Grey has come striding into our lives in the same manor that Mr Darcy did all those years ago when Jane Austin wrote Pride and Prejudice.  In fact strip away all the sex scenes, and Christian Grey is Mr Darcy.  The dark, illusive handsome young man with a mighty fortune that all women fell for.....but every man has to have a flaw in his character. Although Mr Darcy’s was a shy, awkward tendency to struggle in a social situation – which was often mistaken for arrogance, Christian Grey’s affliction is of a much more sinister kind.  Of course Mr Darcy may have had the very same affliction but Miss Elizabeth Bennett would not have discovered this until way after their wedding night!

Mr Darcy in all his splendor!


What is it about a dominant, successful male that attracts us to them?  What makes us want to submit to their will?  As far as we have come in social emancipation, this book (and the mountains of them on sale in Asda) is testament to the fact that women still desire a strong, sexually charged, arrogant man! We will always chase the unobtainable. And sadly settle for the safe and mundane!  So come on girls lets get out amongst it and try and tame that maverick!

I feel that our emotions have not caught up with our instincts!  Strong and independent as we are we still fall at the first hurdle when it comes to a charming man!

Me, in my Agent Provocateur, waiting for Christian Grey or maybe even Mr Darcy!


Unfortunately, Mr Darcy, Christian Grey and Prince Charming are the stuff of fairy tales – and I applaud E.L.James for having written a very modern one! She will be a wealthy woman for the rest of her life!

And as for the rest of us that have been lured into this intoxicating fanciful fairytale, be on your guard and remember that nine times out of ten the slipper doesn’t fit!

Ciao Bella Sorellas
xx






Photo of Colin Firth from the Telegraph. Email Blondinablog@gmail.com for removal.

Wednesday, 25 July 2012


Now I’m the kind of girl that would rather travel, dead broke in first class than hard up in second! So with this in mind my aunt Joyful and I recently embarked on a luxury cruise liner to Norway!


Naturally we had taken a suite on the bridge (one personal butler, and two cabin stewards) and so on a fine sunny morning we bid farewell to the white cliffs of Dover and set sail for the land of clean water, clear skies, and fresh air!




The reason that Norway is so refreshing and breathtakingly beautiful is because the Norwegians are such climate sensitive people. They may appear to be all anoracks and walking boots, but being green, recycling, preserving water and reducing their carbon footprint is so long embedded in their culture it’s just part of their everyday life.



Being a high maintenance kind of girl myself I found all this a little daunting, but having seen the cascading waterfalls, and skies so clear you would think the stars would fall down into the sea, I decided right there and then that I was going to start to do my bit to save the planet!



I started first thing the following morning, and for my trip on the Flam railway (one of the most scenic train routes in Europe) I chose to wear my “Act Fast, Slow Climate Change” Vivienne Westwood scarf, new out this season! 





As i suspected it did the trick and I proved very popular with the Locals, who seemed very impressed with my alternative to the bobble hat! After tea and waffles and much conversation about how good Vivienne is to remind us of the important things in life, even if the message is printed on a £240. Scarf!
Feeling very pleased with my first day’s efforts at saving the planet, I returned to my luxury suite, only to find that in my absence I had left a tap running! “Oops silly me! Must try harder next time!

On my return journey I started reading Vivienne Westwood’s ‘one hundred days of active resistance’ check out day 68 and see how Iceland is getting on! My Vivienne scarf won’t save the planet, but at least it reminds us that we can!

Log on in a few days, when I will reveal my smutty holiday secret!

Ciao Bella Sorellas

xx

Wednesday, 4 July 2012

Last weekend, I finally gave in to the persuasive charms of my BFF, and agreed to try a camping trip .

"If it’s good enough for princess Kate” she said “It’s good enough for you!” So reluctantly I ventured out into the open air, to eat barbecue food “yummy!”, and sing songs round a camp fire “yippee!”, and gaze up at the midnight stars. Actually I didn’t mind that bit, staring absentmindedly into space happens to be one of my particular forte’s!

Singing 'Ging Gang Goolie'
Needless to say it rained, and then it rained some more! And when it had finished raining, it rained again!
Rain + camping field = mud, lots of yucky mud!!!

Cherryblossom and I 










Why one needs a degree in meteorology to forecast the English weather beats me! Any way we still managed to look gorgeous in our matching parkers, denim shorts and Vivienne Westwood wellies. What can I say? us model types just look good in anything!

Two gorgeous sleeping girlies
Personally I found the whole camping experience to be rather overrated; us girls need a little luxury, I mean if you were Princess Kate where would you sleep? Tent / Palace, Tent / Palace, tent / Palace ! “ Oh dear me, however shall I choose?”

“Next time Cherryblossom we are heading for the palace!”
Rock Chicks in wellies
Ciao bella’s
Love Blondina x

Thursday, 28 June 2012

Well today has seen the most dreadful rain, the entire country is a flood hazard!!!! I personally do not venture out in the rain, I just couldn't bare for my cashmere and silk garments to have filthy water splashed all over them and don't even let me begin to describe the horror of what the damp does to my beautiful hair!! 


Any girls out there who do feel brave enough to face this stormy onslaught can do so with confidence in a pair of highly sought after Vivienne Westwood Anarchy Print wellies, the only way to look fabulous striding through puddles!!  We have all seen Princess Kate, Duchess of Cambridge, rocking a £300 pair of designer wellies doing some sort of camping thing with children (can't remember what she was doing - only that she looked resplendent in a Burberry Shirt). Well these beauties are far superior to hers in the fashion stakes and half the price!


Here's a little pic!




And of course we have a lovely little matching bag............



So for now my darlings I must return to my position in the window of Platinum Blonde and watch the passer's by get a good old soaking from the cars. Ha ha!


Ciao Bella Sorella's

x